Archive for the ‘Eisner’ category

Bull Rush in Abril

April 3, 2008

Ok, I’m here. I’m alive, although I’m not sure anybody equated my death with my lack of posting. If so, you should now be feeling an overwhelming sense of relief.

• Last night I went to the Dodger game with Big Daddy Eisner and BDE’s parents, who gainfully employed me during high school. If by some chance, you’re a casual reader of this blog and need BBQ Catering in the Greater Los Angeles Area, please do go with Rosie’s BBQ. We sat in the orange (second level), which proved to be pretty good. The seats were under the overhang, but still in prime foul ball territory, which always makes things exciting, although BDE and I slightly disagree on catching technique. He opts for catching like an egg, where as I’m of the belief that you should cradle it into the body, rib injury be damned. The game sucked, it was cold, and I made myself even colder by eating an ice cream sandwich in the later innings. Also, I think Scott owes me money for parking. (I will, however, accept BBQ food in the place of money.)

• I did a video with college wrestling fans and participants a couple of weeks ago for SI. You’ve probably already made up your mind about whether this interests you, but it’s up on the new version of my site at SI Tour Guy. Hopefully in the coming months, the SI player will be upgraded so that everybody can watch videos on the site that wants to, with no problems.

• I’ve been running more and more and my body seems to be holding up. I attribute this to my listening to the Tony Kornheiser Show on the ol’ Shuffle. Nothing gets you jacked up to keep pushing yourself like a cranky guy pushing 60 who endlessly complains. Good stuff.

• There’s a Sharky’s five minutes from me that is outstanding, save for their horrible, semi-paved parking lot.

• The Ducks just opened spring practice. I did my best to explain the issues being addressed to Yackie, and I must say, she did a fairly good job of following along. What I’ve done to her may now be more clearly defined as a “near-thorough brainwashing.”

• Frozen custard in St. Louis is excellent. After getting lost (in what must be the most abandoned major city in the country), Sully and I made it to Ted Drewes, where around 60 people were eating frozen custard in 40 degree weather. The other highlight was going into North St. Louis (not East) and getting the best ribs I’ve ever eaten. Were we the only two white people in the neighborhood? Almost. Was it as bad as it was described to us? Not so much.

The best thing was returning the car immediately after eating those ribs and having the Avis employees completely flip out at how great the rib smell was as soon as we opened the door. Good folk in the StL.

• I’ve been watching season one of Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job (actual title), the 12 minute sketch show on Adult Swim, and it’s pretty funny. It gets a little odd sometimes, but well worth one’s time (if he or she were to have too much of it). Friend of the blog Esa (Garbage blog, see right) recommended Frisky Dingo, also on Adult Swim. I’ve watched four episodes (12 min), also pretty funny. See, this is why I’ve been running so much, I either do nothing or kill myself doing something, I’m strange. is the best thing ever to help you do nothing. I’ve been watching Arrested Development episodes that I’ve already seen, nonstop.

“You mean he can’t even grow his own hair? C’mon!”

Oregon basketball is not so good. Next year, the team will be completely different, let’s hope Big Ern gets some new assistants, as well. Luckily, Big Mike Dunigan (incoming 5* center) won’t have to deal with those pesky Brothers Lopez. God was this year awful to watch.

• I think I’m going to start doing some new web stuff in the near future, all this time is ridiculous. Stay tuned. Or don’t. Whatever, it’s coo.

• Old friend Sam is moving to London. I ate steaks with him and other people from the Cbas last weekend. Ray Romano was there, but he seemed to want to eat with other people and not recognize that Sam was leaving. Sucker.

We went up to Sam’s office at Google around the corner, where I got way too excited about free candy and played Rock Band for the first time. I killed it on lead vox during Fall Out Boy and The Killers. EPIC.

• Yackie framed my two magazine appearances with the covers of the respective issues they appear in. The thought is great, but I now am constantly distracted by a Playboy cover in front of me with a giant painted ass. I’m not sure if this is a good thing or not.

• Just so you know, navel oranges are for sure in season.

This is getting long. That’s what she said.



Uh Oh

April 6, 2007

• Oops, Colin Cowherd sorta kinda did something that was not so good today. Calling on listeners to jam a web site is not such a good plan if you don’t want to be investigated by the FCC.

I listened to him some in Eugene because, you’ll have to trust me on this one, there is NOTHING good on the radio in Eugene. I don’t mind flipping through terrible pop stations, but even those were somehow way worse in Eugene. Anyway, occasionally I’ll sit through a couple minutes of the show because he’s on the station my clock radio is tuned to, but honestly, the guy’s purely schtick. I never really listened to Tony Kornheiser when he was on ESPN in the mornings because I would usually listen to Stern, but I decided to download the podcast of his XM show on iTunes, and WOW, his show is far more entertaining and doesn’t make you want to throw up a little in your mouth, like most of Cowherd’s incoherent, condescending rants make me want to do on a semi-regular basis. ESPN Radio would be smart to move in a new direction, and that direction should be towards anything that isn’t Cowherd.

• The fantasy squad is climbing into the week. I’ve never played in a match-up league, so for it’s alright, but the roughly 47 offensive categories that are counted seems counterintuitive. In protest, I will only be checking my team’s progress 52 times a day, instead of the traditional 53.

The Office was back last night for its first new episode in 822 weeks and now I can’t hold a grudge anymore. It was all good, down to MissTerious, Dwight’s throwing stars, Toby taking a deposition, and the certificate with the teddy bear. And on a semi-related note, Jenna Fischer is skyrocketing up my unofficial rankings that I keep at the ready in the ol’ cerebellum. She’s clearly dressed down and sort of fugged up on The Office, but she always seemed like she had an extra gear with a ton of upside (unclear on the wingspan) a la Tyrus Thomas. Judging from the stills from Blades of Glory (and a positive report from Charlottesville, VA’s most trusted sports anchor), she appears to have realized her potential and more. Throw in this shot from some magazine, and we’re talking sleeper top 3. Alright, I’m done perving out for the day.

Eisner is breaking hearts. Ladies, you’re officially on notice. You probably won’t see a noticable difference when the first Dodger photo essay of the season arrives in the next few weeks. But if you look closely, you’ll probably see a large group of women in the background clawing each other’s eyes, yelling at each other, crying over Scott not calling back, and generally trembling in his presence. He’s like an Axe Body Spray commercial combined with a Tag Body Spray commercial. Yea, hard to top that.

• I turned down the Kentucky job. Just wasn’t for me.

Sopranos is back Sunday. This is the event that happens every two years that gets me swearing more than I should and also figuring out how I can successfully shake people down. This began my freshman year of high school when I started yelling at my buddy Esa out of nowhere using words in Italian that I only had the foggiest idea about. I regret nothing.

• It pains me to say it, given our history, but the Rachael Ray talk show is atrocious. She’s just not good around…people. I like her way more talking to food than humans. Sad to say, but she probably peaked in ’03 with the mini-burgers episode. Still a classic.

• Nate on Leno tonight. Spread the palabra.